Struggling With the Whys of Life

“The Lord says, “My thoughts are not like your thoughts.  Your ways are not like my ways.  Just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.”  Isaiah 55:8-9

“Why didn’t God heal my son?”  She cried.  “I prayed and begged God, but my son died.”  She was angry but she was still talking with God.  We pray for healing, and some people are healed physically while others are healed in Heaven.  It does not make sense.  We cannot understand how God makes His decisions.  We want a reason.

The world is filled with things that happen that do not make sense – innocent children who are hurt and suffer, children with cancer and diseases, hunger, homelessness, grief, death, and the list goes on and on.  There are political, environmental, social and genetic explanations but I am not going to debate or go down that trail.  None of the explanations meet the emotional need of the struggle of why.

We want to understand why something happened. Our mind thinks if we figure it out and put all the pieces together, then we will not hurt or struggle anymore.  Once we comprehend how it happened, we are unable to change the end result.  Our loved one still died.  The situation still happened.  All the knowledge and figuring out does not change the reality.

I believe in prayer and the power of prayer.  God hears every prayer.  Sometimes God changes His mind.  For example, in the Bible in 2 Kings, Hezekiah is sick and is told he will die and to put his house in order.  He prays and Isaiah comes to him and tells him God has heard his prayer.  God will heal him and grant him fifteen more years of life.  God hears.  Sometimes God physically heals.  The Bible is filled with healings, and Jesus healed throughout his ministry. This gives us hope.

God answers every prayer but not always in the way we want God to nor in the time we desire.  Isaiah tells us God’s ways and thoughts are higher than ours – God sees the big picture.  We only see a glimpse from our perspective.  Our focus is our little world around us.  We have a plan of how we want it to be and look.  We desire to control and then have God bless our plan.

Even when we know God is in control, we get upset when life seems to be a struggle or our attitude turns sour for no particular reason.  Ever have one of those days when you just have a negative attitude and you struggle just to be a nice person?  You are smiling right now, right?  You have had one of those days.  You love Jesus, and Jesus lives in your heart, but you just don’t care today.  You ask yourself, “Why am I acting and feeling this way?”  You try harder, and it doesn’t make a difference.  You don’t understand. 

First of all, you are human and not every day do you feel at the top of your game.  It is allowing yourself to have “blah” moments or days, but they do not define who you really are or want to be.  It is surrendering the ugly and the struggle to God.  Allow God to heal and redeem it.  Do not beat yourself up but forgive yourself and let it go.  You may not figure out the reason you feel the way you do, but you can still let it go and not live in it forever.

There are so many “whys” in life.  If we live in the whys, we will never really live.  I am learning to pray, “God, I don’t understand why this happened, but I still trust you.”  This is not burying my head in the sand or trying to escape facing life.  To me, it is admitting I am not God, and I am not in charge.  The weight of the world is not on my shoulders.  I do not need to wallow in the struggles of life and stay in the victim mode.  I need to grieve my losses, hurts, and pains but not stay there and let them define me.  It is changing my focus. 

It is not focusing on the why question but on the answer – Jesus.  Jesus loves me, knows me, and Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life.  He understands.  In childlike faith, I trust Him.  And that is enough for me.  If I spend my days focusing on trying to answer the “why”, I will never enjoy the moments God gives me.  I need to look up and see God’s presence in the beauty around me and not miss the blessings found outside the struggles of life.

God, I don’t understand but I trust You.

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Need some help living in the present and trusting when you do not understand?  My book – Live Different Moments – is for you.  You will find it on Amazon or at Tea Story in Upper Sandusky.