Focused On Performance

Life is to be lived with purpose and simply with your focus on today.  Within each day you complete tasks, execute plans, and achieve successes.  Some days you just survive and function minimally.  Life has its ups and downs.  Where is your focus?  Who are you living and doing life for?

Some people focus on how their life looks to others.  Life becomes a performance – an act to demonstrate to others you have it all together and you look good.  Basically, you stage an act to prove to people who are not focused on you that you are strong, blessed, and can handle whatever happens in life.  Your life is like a TV show where you never see behind the scenes of what is really going on.

When you live in performance mode – you are pretending and existing in a fake life.  You appear to do everything the right way, follow all the rules, and look good on the outside.  But within, you are exhausted from the work of pretending to be OK when you are not.  Life is not fulfilling and relationships are shallow and empty.

Performance is not all negative.  You want to perform well in your work, school, sports, music, and complete tasks and achieve goals.  Sometimes though performance becomes so focused on tasks, goals, the next level of achievement that you never celebrate and enjoy what you are currently doing.  It is always future focused – how to get better – and you never fully celebrate the present and enjoy the moments of life.

This concept gets translated into your faith and relationships.  You have to achieve more and be the best or you will not be loved and accepted.  This is an untruth that creates a false narrative in your head.  You keep serving and doing more and more in hopes you will be accepted.  You never know when you have done enough to receive what you desire the most – the words of affirmation. You become exhausted and burned out.

Performance mode is overwhelming.  It is being able to find the balance.  It is doing your very best because of who you are, not to prove to someone else that you are worthy.  It is enjoying what you are doing so that it brings meaning and fulfillment to your life.  If you are doing something just because you think it will look good to others or because someone else wants you to do it, you will resent the relationship eventually.

Affirm yourself.  Believe in who you are and who you are becoming.  Learn to forgive yourself and let go of your past failures and mess ups.  Give yourself grace.  You are your own unique self.  Your life’s meaning and purpose is not defined by other people so what you do cannot be defined by them either.  Perform for an audience of One.  Be your genuine self but continue to grow and mature into all you were created to be.

Meeting the expectations of others all the time is exhausting.  You want to be liked and considered a person others enjoy being around.  Release the exhaustion of trying to do things that are not your skills and you do not enjoy.  Find enjoyment in life by being all God made you to be.  Do not allow others to define you.  Learn to enjoy your own company and like who you are.  Live in the now and find fulfillment in today.

Elaine J. Sturtz

Living In The Different

Elaine will be leading a seminar – “Living Life Forward” – Saturday, March 22nd from 9 am to 12 pm at Trinity Evangelical Church.  All are invited.  Just call the church to reserve your spot – 419-294-1535.